July 2019 Blog ~ Stop Over Thinking and Over Analyzing.
Stop over thinking and over analyzing.
Are you having trouble identifying your goals or do you lack direction? Maybe this will be a good read for you and hopefully, offer some perspective.
I’m a 45 year old wife and mother to two amazing girls. I consider myself to be very active. I go to the gym 4-5 times per week. I am a group fitness instructor here at Impact Fitness and also at the YMCA in Springvale. I need the occasional creative outlet, so I enjoy furniture transformations, an outdoor project and writing this is also a great outlet. I have also figured out I’m a great cheerleader. I love to see the people around me succeed and do well.
Often times, I feel envious of the people I cheer for because they appear to have direction. Passion. A clear and decisive plan to do whatever it takes to achieve that goal. Which leads me to the meat of my blog.
What am I going to be when I grow up? What is my calling? Can anyone relate? It’s a question I ask myself all the time. I’m having fun in the mean time, but pretty regularly that thought enters my mind.
I am fortunate enough to be a stay at home mom. Basically, I have the freedom to do whatever it is I choose at any given moment (within reason, of course). By no means am I downplaying the importance and value of my role presently, because my family comes first, but still, I wonder, is there another purpose for me?
What if you yearn for a greater sense of accomplishment while being a stay at home parent? Motherhood/fatherhood is rewarding but, is that all we do for 18 years? What do we do to feed our souls? What keeps that fire burning? What inspires us?
I get a sense of accomplishment from all the things I do in my day. Conversely, I feel as though I have wasted my day if it only consists of laundry, wiping the occasional nose or just planning dinner. I wonder if it’s because I don’t punch a time clock or I don’t really have anyone to hold me accountable, but me.
I am spontaneous and enjoy being where ever the day takes me. What’s the problem then? I’ll tell you. Over thinking. That’s the problem.
An article in Tinybuddha.com., recently caught my eye. The title of the article was ‘ 4 lessons on how to find the right direction in life’ by Bob Miglani.
Basically, the article describes Bob dealing with what I am describing. He felt as though he had a greater calling even though he had a good job. For the most part, he followed that unspoken rule some of us have prescribed to at one point in our lives, “work hard, save money, buy a house and live happily ever after.”
It simply wasn’t enough. There had to be more.
In the article Bob identifies 4 lessons he used to find and implement direction in his life:
1.) Stop over thinking.
2.) Try anything. Do something.
3.) Follow your inner voice.
4.) Believe in yourself.
So simple. So true. I get so caught up in over thinking at times, its paralyzing. I can create, recreate, have a full conversation, feel guilty, fight with, and apologize to, all in my own little cranium, no person needed. I’ll be the first to admit, it’s ridiculous. It didn’t change anything; it just gave me anxiety and stress.
Over thinking doesn’t get us anywhere. It keeps us awake at night or we lose valuable time in our day. We cannot predict the future, so at some point we have to accept we are where we are supposed to be for a reason. So, how do we manage it? One of my favorite lines in this particular lesson was “by recognizing and accepting the unpredictable nature of life, we can stop over thinking and over analyzing, and start living more in the present moment.”
Next, ‘Try anything. Do something.’ The one thing we can all control is our own actions. Our actions keep us from “spinning’ back into overanalyzing and over thinking. We all have control over our own thoughts, words and actions. We can’t control life but we can control how we react to it. Take action. Ask questions, engage in a conversation you know nothing about, step outside of your comfort zone and take that risk, “you never know where that one step will lead you,” says Bob.
Follow your inner voice. Bob felt if he knew more he would be able to make better, more informed decisions, so he began to research tirelessly. In actuality, he often felt more overwhelmed and just inundated with more junk. He was still incapable of making a decision. Just let go. Follow your gut. Take chances. Maybe you’ll make the wrong decision, but you’re not sitting there waiting for something to come to you. You took action.
Final point and I believe the most important. Believe in yourself. 100% and wholeheartedly. No one will be a bigger cheerleader for you, than you. Don’t be suppressed by someone else’s ideas of what is best for you. Stop comparing your story to someone else’s. Just because someone can picture you “being perfect in a particular role” don’t settle for it, if it’s not for you.
If you don’t know what you want to be at 25, 35, 45, or 55 maybe it just hasn’t’ presented itself yet. Stop over thinking it. Try anything. Do something. Take action. Follow your inner voice. Believe in yourself.
In conclusion, I was hoping this would be some great fitness related piece, but this is what happened to be on my heart, so I went with it. More than anything, I love to help people, so if this speaks to some of you and offers you a different perspective, awesome. Maybe you won’t lie awake one more night over thinking. You’ll be rested and ready to crush your work out tomorrow.
It’s just life guys. Make it count. Be kind. Be present. ~ Danielle